The most common question Erick and I get from friends, family, & our very own coworkers is, “When are you gonna get hāpai?”
The answer: I don’t wanna be or planning on being hāpai.
I know one day I’ll be hāpai & we’ll have amazing, beautiful, & smart keiki’s, but right now, I love the way my life is. I love just being a wife, a dog mom, & a step mom. I’m not ready to give my life to another human being. I know it’s selfish, but I love having my sole focus on myself, my husband, and our life together.
I also know that you will NEVER be ready to have kids, but my ready is not that kind of ready. Financially and living situation, we’re “ready” to have keiki’s, but MENTALLY, we are not there. We have too much going on in our life and too many things we want to do with just the two of us.
The thing that irritates me the most is when people “push us” to get hāpai, but it’s like… you are not the one who will be taking care of this child. You are not the one who is responsible of this child. You are not going to be the “babysitter” for us. It’s all hear say. I get it that every single person in our life (ok, maybe I’m exaggerating a lot …lol) wants us to have kids cause it’s “the thing to say” when you’re married… but oh my lawd… stop.
It’ll happen when it happens. If I can, I’d prolong getting hāpai to about 33-34 years old. I am, in all means, NO RUSH. Erick wants us to start trying next year, but I’ve slowly convinced him to re think the decision. Maybe no keiki’s at all might be in our future. You never know. This world is a messed up and scary place.
xo, the mrs.